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Wednesday, September 03, 2008

The Atlantic Ocean....

Today, I am feeling so humbled by the Lord's hand in my life.

In 2007, we found out that we were infertile.
There were no explanations....
Our insurance wouldn't allow us to have any further tests....

We were shocked. I was broken. I hurt every day.

The depression hit hard

My mom called often to check on me.
I smiled
But, she knew better.

I bawled.
every day.

It was hard to be so angry and so devastated all the time.

how did I even begin to explain that it was possible to feel two deeply rooted feelings at the same time: elated for people who were having babies. and completely empty because I couldn't.

If you think the Atlantic ocean is big.

it didn't really compare to the tears I cried.

So:

time passed.

a lot of it.

August 2006
September
October
November
December
January 2007 ( we finally went to the doctor...)
February
March
April
May.
June.
July. (we started the adoption paperwork)
August
September
October
November
December
January 2008 (finally we can be chosen through LDS family services)
February
March

20 LONG months
I felt like I had done everything I could do.
There were no more tears. (okay, there were still some...)

And then
APRIL 2008
Sweet Joanie allowed us to take Henry home.
Each day we thank Heavenly Father for her sacrifice.
We talked to Joanie a few weeks ago and she feels that she needs to move on with her life, and let this part of her life stay in her past.

But, we want everyone who reads this to know how much we love her.

The tears that filled the months and months of infertility have taken a back seat to the joy we have felt through the miracle of adoption.

Joanie, we love you. We want you to know that we will continue to give Henry two hugs and two kisses. We will love him. WE will teach him about Jesus Christ. We will nurture him. We will play with him. And, we will love you forever.

Thank you for this sacrifice.



6 comments:

Aubry Wilkes said...

OH goodness- Henry is absolutely adorable! Those big eyes and a sweet face... what a blessing for your family... I love you Brandi

Erika said...

You have such sweet boys. Wasn't it worth it?
By the way, we're actually in Kingsville (super south texas) which is where the pharmacy is at. But thanks for thinking of us!!! We may end up in college station for a little while during is 4th year though.

Ann-Marie said...

both of your boys are so cute! good work david and brandi!

Jaush and Amy said...

We love Joanie too! What a cute kid. Hopefully Link doesnt want to give him back still....ha ha. Remember the lord loves you and remembers you, be patient and you will have as many kids in your home as you desire.

Kelly said...

Your boys are so cute - and you are amazing!

Brew Crew said...

I keep telling everyone that I have the cutest grandsons and the most beautiful granddaughter alive. And I too am grateful for Joanie and love her for her amazing sacrifice.